Surging mosh pit melee
ferocious rhythm ripping
foaming white sweat flies
rebellious undertow
deep silted thought slides
relentless beat pounding
lips taste salt stained air
ceaseless movement catches
risk seeking rock faces
Submerging captured minds.


9 responses to “Waves

  1. I can actually feel this poem as I read it, Abi. There’s a headlong crashing to it, even when you take us below the surface–and I mean “below the surface” in both literal and figurative senses.
    The comparisons of waves and their non-wave metaphors are vivid and well-framed.
    I think this is marvelous. And very much YOU.

  2. Excellent representation of that search for oblivion that takes so many forms, frantic and yet numb. Deft writing.

  3. You been to a ‘gig’ lately, Abi. Have to say I’ve never been in a mosh pit, but I’ve heard vivid enough descriptions of it from my children – body surfing and all – to know that this definitely has the feel of one, from “relentless beat pounding” to “risk seeking rock faces
    Submerging captured minds.”
    Its very apt and economical use of language is remarkably good, Abi. This one warms mi belly, even though the subject is not my scene.

  4. The finish was the hard sell for me. A wonderful romp above, below, submerged in your words! Glad you were able to join us! 🙂 Happy OpenLinkNight!

  5. nice…i have spent many a night inthe mosh pit and you capture much of its energy and feel in your imagery…

    so you read last night? would love to hear about it…very cool…

  6. For crying out loud, gimme a towel! I’ve been whipped, lashed, and thrown about by your words. What an incredible choice of verbiage. The Pub is flooded! A storm of poetic talent lashing the reader to the rocks! Well done!

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